


Sand Through the Hourglass

by ExoEl88



Series: Baekyeol Childhood Friends AU [1]
Category: EXO (Band), SM Entertainment | SMTown
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Childhood Friends, Friendship/Love, Heartache, M/M, Mentions of Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-10
Updated: 2015-09-10
Packaged: 2018-04-19 06:13:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,357
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4735493
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ExoEl88/pseuds/ExoEl88
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Little by little, Chanyeol loses Baekhyun.<br/>Little by little, he realizes he was in love the entire time.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sand Through the Hourglass

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for expressing interest! This is my first Baekyeol fic, so feedback would be wonderful.  
> I'll also be posting this on Asian FanFics under the pen name "E-X-O-El"

Chanyeol experiments a lot in high school. He's eager to try things and he wants to learn more about himself. He dates boys and girls alike and discovers that he doesn't really like girls. Yes, they are pretty, but they just aren't what he wants. Besides, guys are so much easier. They tend to be more straightforward, something he appreciates tremendously.

He comes out to Baekhyun first, of course. And he is floored when his best friend exchanges the same words. It wasn't until that day that he'd ever really heard Baekhyun speak about himself and romance or even sex. Not that him being gay is a surprise at all, when he thinks about it in hindsight.

They continue being the way they always are: close. They do skinships a lot more than most guys do. It's always been that way. It feels natural to do so. After all, Chanyeol can barely remember a time when he hasn't known Byun Baekhyun. Not that he ever wants to, either. His best friend is like the sun; he lights up everything he touches. But he doesn't think of him in a romantic kind of way. He doesn't think about pressing him against the wall and locking their lips. His best friend is just that. Nothing more, nothing less. So he continues dating around, hardly paying any real attention to love or romance. He's enjoying his youth and bachelor status. By their senior year, he's known as the school's playboy.

As Chanyeol relays the tale of another one night stand, he notices that his best friend's gaze is not focused on him. "Hey, Baek, did you hear anything I just said?"

The older brings his gaze back for a second. "Sorry, just thinking."

"What could possibly be more important?" he asks sarcastically, smirking at him. 

He doesn't miss the way his cheeks turn red. "Uh, it's nothing," Baekhyun replies, looking down at his half eaten lunch.

"No, tell me!" Chanyeol says, curiosity burning in his stomach.

"You'll laugh," Baekhyun murmurs, taking a sip of his water.

"I won't," he replies stubbornly. He wants to know what has gotten into him.

"I'm going out on a date tonight," the older says, burying his face in his hands to try and cover his flushed cheeks. 

"You are? With who?" Chanyeol asks, immediately tense. He blames it on the fact that he knows this is Baekhyun's first date and he knows how terrible some guys are. Most of the guys in the school are much like Chanyeol. They'll flirt it up, turn on the charm. But there is only one intention in their mind. Chanyeol is worried because Baekhyun deserves something much better than being treated like that. 

"Oh Sehun," Baekhyun answers with a smile. "He's younger than us."

Sehun. Chanyeol can't seem to put a face to the name, but he has heard of him. He's in Jinki's group, if he can recall. Best friends with Kim Jongin. Overall, they are a decent batch of guys from what he's heard. But he still doesn't know much about them. That group of friends tend to prioritize dancing and recitals over a social life, so they're pretty quiet. That doesn't mean they are in the clear, though. 

"Let me know if he oversteps his bounds. I'll put him in his place real quick."

Baekhyun just nods and goes back to his food. Chanyeol looks at him a little differently as he eats. He's trying to see what his best friend sees in guys and dating. And that's when he notices that Baekhyun is really attractive. His eyes, in particular, look really nice with the eyeliner he wears. And he does have quite a good sense in fashion. How did all these things go unnoticed by him? He wonders, eyeing him out of his peripheral.

He shakes it off because yes, Baekhyun is gorgeous, but it has nothing to do with him.

\---

The next day Chanyeol sees him, he's dressed to the nines and has a radiant smile lighting up his features. He tries to ignore the strange feeling blooming in his chest when he looks at Baekhyun now. 

"My, my. What's gotten into you?" he asks playfully, leaning against Baekhyun's locker.

"The date went really well, and I asked him out on another. He said yes!" the older says happily, humming one of his favorite songs.

"Congrats," Chanyeol says for lack of something better to say. He knows a good friend would ask for more details, but he doesn't really want to hear it. He's about to make up an excuse to leave when Baekhyun beats him to the punch.

"I should get going. Sehun-ah is going to walk me to my first period. Bye, Chanyeol!" he says, still with that incredible smile on his lips, as he strides down the hall with a new pep in his step. 

Chanyeol smiles an empty smile out of obligation. He honestly should be happy that Baekhyun is happy, but something doesn't feel right and he's not sure what it is. He tries to ignore it as he walk to his first class.

He tells himself it's only because he's worried about Baekhyun. This is his first time dating, and he doesn't want him to get hurt. That's all it is. Friendly protectiveness. Maybe even brotherly. They've always been closer than just best friends. 

\---

It's been a few weeks since Baekhyun and Sehun became official boyfriends, and Chanyeol is lonely. Baekhyun's been spending all his time with his new beau, and Chanyeol finds himself longing to spend time with him. He doesn't think much of it because he knows it's normal to miss your friends, especially your close ones. He doesn't like it that Baekhyun is almost always busy now.

As he sits down at the usual table he shares with Baekhyun for lunch, his phone vibrates against his thigh. Curious, he pulls it out, wondering who would be texting him right now.

**From: Baekhyunnie**

**Hey Chan! Sitting with Sehun-ah for lunch today. You should come over sometime so I can introduce you!**

Chanyeol frowns at the text because he already misses his best friend. Lunch is their one constant now. Or well, it used to be. But he has no idea how to voice this to him without sounding jealous. And he certainly isn't jealous. 

He just misses his best friend.

That's what he keeps telling himself, at least.

\---

The following Friday, Chanyeol follows Baekhyun reluctantly to the place he's been eating at for lunch. Apparently Sehun and his friends like to eat in the lobby of the fine arts building. There are a couple benches there, all filled with people Chanyeol doesn't really know. 

"Hey guys! This is Chanyeol," Baekhyun says happily. He looks over at them and smiles kind of shyly. He's not used to Baekhyun knowing people he doesn't. Nonetheless, he tries to shake off his discomfort. If he grows closer to this crowd, he might be able to spend more time with his best friend.

A tall boy with long legs and dark hair stands up and kisses Baekhyun on the cheek. Chanyeol already doesn't like this "Sehun" person with the way he snakes his arm around his best friend's waist. He tries not to frown at the two of them and Sehun's almost possessive attitude towards Baekhyun. "This is Sehunnie, my boyfriend," Baekhyun introduces with a genuine smile on his face. 

"Nice to meet you," Sehun says, offering a hand. Chanyeol shakes it and smiles to the best of his ability. It probably came across as tight and uncomfortable. 

"Nice to meet you, too," he replies as friendly as he can.

Baekyhun quickly introduces him to the rest of the group. Apparently, they all belong to the same dance studio, and it's where they spend most of their free time. They all seem pretty cool, but the people he can actually see himself becoming decent friends with are Jongin and Taemin. The rest are a little too much and aren't the type of people he'd spend a whole lot of time with. They're rowdier than he expected them to be. Especially "Bling Bling Jjong" who seems to get along with Baekhyun flawlessly. 

Besides, something resounds in him when he hears the story of how Taemin and Jongin were childhood friends turned boyfriends. He thinks their story is sweet, and he's envious of the way they are so in tune with each other's wants and needs. 

When the lunch bell rings, they all disperse for class.

\---

A few months go by, and Chanyeol sees Baekhyun less and less. He would like to blame it all on Sehun, but it's not entirely his fault. Senior year is busy, and Baekhyun even got a part time job at a grocery store as a cashier. (No doubt to pay for all the dates he goes on with Sehun.) Also, Sehun's friends seem to invite Baekhyun to every social event they have going on. Sometimes Chanyeol's invited by Taemin or Jongin, but mostly, he's not invited. Most of the time, it's spur of the moment plans, too, so he doesn't really hold it against Baekhyun. 

But Chanyeol is starting to feel sad now. He's already past the annoyed stage. He just really, really, _really_ wants his best friend back. He feels like he's been pulled away from him unjustly. It's not fair.

One day, Chanyeol is sick of staring at lazy notes and heavy textbooks. He's restless. He just wants to move around and get out of the house. At first, he has no destination in mind. Then he suddenly gets the urge to see Baekhyun at work. He's only visited once before, despite his best friend begging him to stop by more often.

He walks into the store with a basket in hand. If he's honest, he doesn't need or want anything, but if he's going to go through the checkout, he needs to buy something. Aisle by aisle, he sees nothing of interest until he sees a box of Baekhyun's favorite candy. They are on sale, so he puts two in his basket. Maybe he can eat it on his next break or something.

He wanders around until he finds the drinks section. He's kind of parched from walking over here, so he tosses a bottle of overpriced water in his basket and heads to the checkstands up front.

His heart skips a beat when he sees Baekhyun because, what the hell? When did he pierce his ears? And damn did he look good in all black.

He supposes that even at work, Baekhyun would do his best to appear stylish. His hair is slicked off to the side and gentle black eyeliner outlines his eyes. He wears simple silver jewelry, probably all he can get away with, and has a black cardigan over his work shirt.

Chanyeol realizes that Sehun is one hell of a lucky guy.

"Channie?"

He's snapped from his thoughts and places the basket on the counter.

"Hey," he greets, looking down as he digs out his wallet. He hopes Baekhyun misses the blush heating his cheeks.

"Hi! I'm glad you came. What brings you here?" he asks cheerfully, automatically tapping buttons on his register from memory.

"Nothing really. Just thought I'd drop by," he replies, finally meeting his eyes.

"It's great to see you!" he chirps, scanning his items without really looking at them. "I feel like I haven't seen you in ages!"

"Same. And when did you pierce your ears?" Chanyeol asks, half tempted to pinch an ear. He probably would, if Baekhyun wasn't at work.

A glorious smile stretches across his face. "I just did it Friday night. I've been wanting to do it for a while! Anyway, your total is $4.97," he says with ease.

Chanyeol really likes how cheerful he is at work. No doubt it's mainly just customer service, but he isn't like that at school. Not unless he's with Sehun.

"It looks good," he compliments as he hands over a five dollar bill.

"Three cents back for you. Here's your receipt! I'm off in ten minutes if you want to wait," he says with another genuine smile.

"Sure," he says, returning the smile. He can't remember the last time they hung out alone, or without Baekhyun texting Sehun. "I'll be right outside."

After he walks away, he realizes he totally forgot to tell Baekhyun that one of the candies were for him. Oh well. He can just give it to him when he meets him outside. He puts his headphones in and tries to wait patiently. He's too excited, though. He can finally spend time with him!

After those ten long minutes pass, Baekhyun comes out of the store without his name tag on. He hugs Chanyeol and says, "Hi! Sorry to keep you waiting."

Chanyeol laughs for the first time in weeks. It feels good to be around his best friend again. "You're such an ass, making me wait outside for you for ten whole minutes," he says with as much sarcasm as he can.

Baekhyun just grins at him. "Come on, let's go get something to eat," he suggests. "I'll pay."

Chanyeol doesn't really want Baekhyun to pay. He feels kind of uncomfortable with the idea since it's honestly no problem for him to use the money his parents give him as an allowance. "You don't have to," he replies. "I can pay for myself."

"No, I want to! It's nice being able to spend it on someone. I've already bought all the things Sehun and I could possibly want and I still have tons left over." Baekhyun says animatedly as he starts walking.

"Fine. Just this once," he concedes as he follows his best friend.

They walk to Baekhyun's newfound favorite restaurant, across the street from where he works. Apparently, he's a regular here. They already know what he wants before he orders it. Meanwhile, Chanyeol spends a couple minutes glancing over the menu, only half paying attention. He's too busy listening to Baekhyun talk about things in general. For once, it's not all about Sehun.

His heart kind of hurts to hear about all the fun things he's been doing with Sehun's friends. At first, he thinks it's jealousy. Baekhyun has a more active social life than he does (for the first time ever.) But he quickly realizes it's not quite like that.

It's that Baekhyun has been spending time with everybody but him, apparently. 

That's why he's jealous.

"Baek, we should spend more time together," he says, interrupting whatever he was talking about.

"Yeah, we should. I'll make more time for you, okay? I promise. Anyway, what's been going on with you?" Baekhyun asks before he sips his water. 

Nothing.

But of course he's not going to say that.

"I've been busy spending time with Joonmyun and Minseok. We went to the movies the other day."

Lie.

"Oh, what movie did you see?" Baekhyun asks, tilting his head to the side. Chanyeol's gaze goes back to the menu.

"I don't remember the name. It was an action movie," he says lamely. He's not sure if Baekhyun can see through the lie, though.

"Ah, that's okay. I forget movie names sometimes, too," he says, and suddenly his phone goes off.

Chanyeol can tell by the smile forming on his face that it's Sehun. He doesn't know whether he should acknowledge it or not, so he decides to wait and see if Baekhyun will put his phone away or not.

He doesn't.

The rest of their dinner goes on uneventfully. The conversation is slower now that Sehun has Baekhyun's undivided attention, and Chanyeol doesn't know what to say without sounding rude, so he keeps quiet and lets Baekhyun drive what little conversation they have.

Chanyeol wishes his heart didn't feel so heavy when he says goodbye.

\---

The next week, Baekhyun is making more of an effort to see him. They make plans occasionally, just the two of them. And Chanyeol can almost forget how sad he feels when he's not around Baekhyun. They keep it simple, and Baekhyun doesn't really bring up Sehun or his other friends much. Chanyeol hopes it's not obvious that he doesn't like it, but it's almost impossible to keep things from someone who can read him like an open book. Instead, they just talk about video games, books, and sometimes movies.

One day, though, he brings up the topic of sex. He's curious to know how far Baekhyun has gone with Sehun, even though he's positive he's not going to like what he hears.

The older between them blushes slightly and fiddles with his silver stud earring. "Sehun and I have been having sex for just a few weeks. Ah, actually, since I got my ears pierced."

"Oh?" he asks, wondering why they would have taken so long to go all the way. "Who bottomed?"

"Chanyeol!" Baekhyun scolds. "I'm not going to delve into my sex life with you. That was always your forte!" He says, shaking his head side to side.

"You're right. But I'm not so into the playboy thing anymore, Baek. I want a real relationship... like the one you have with Sehun." He hates those last seven words, because they feel so wrong coming out of his mouth. He can't pinpoint what makes him feel that way, though, so he doesn't say anything. 

He feels another pang of sadness at the shocked face of his best friend. " _What?_ I didn't expect this of you. You've always preached about how you love the bachelor lifestyle."

Chanyeol looks down at his feet, suddenly very shy. "I, uh... Things have changed."

He's surprised when he feels Baekhyun's arms wrap around his neck. "I'm so proud of you! This is good. Who's the lucky guy?" he asks, genuinely happy for Chanyeol.

He returns the embrace and breathes in Baekhyun's scent before he pulls away. "Uh... no one. I mean, not yet," he replies, already missing the warmth of his best friend.

"Well I'm sure you'll meet someone soon!" The brunette boy says cheerfully.

The problem is, Chanyeol's not sure if he wants to meet anyone. It's a scary thought, but... he thinks he already know who it is that he wants a real relationship with. He wants to deny it, though. Also, he knows the feelings are not mutual.

His heart hurts. After that day, he distances himself from Baekhyun just enough to go under the radar.

\---

The next few months are even busier than the last, and Chanyeol has only seen Baekhyun in school. He always looks so happy, surrounded by his new group of friends. Chanyeol can't ever seem to find him alone. He's either with Sehun or one of the people Sehun introduced him to. He starts to feel like he's been replaced, and it hurts, even if he's part of the reason it happened. 

He really wants his best friend back. He misses spending time with him. He misses the way they'd play video games together on Saturday afternoons or the way they'd study together in Baekhyun's room. He wants their uncomplicated, easy going relationship back. 

But he can't change the way his heart thumps in his chest whenever he sees Baekhyun. He can't change the way he feels about Sehun. He can't stop the jealousy that eats away at him whenever he sees Sehun's hands resting on Baekhyun's hips during lunch.

They look so natural together... so touchy, but not in a pervy kind of way. It's like two magnets, drawn together. It's natural, and it hurts to see. Baekhyun is just so comfortable around Sehun, like his awkwardness with romance has completely vanished. They look a lot more like Taemin and Jongin.

Chanyeol wishes that Baekhyun was still that comfortable with him. They used to do skinship a lot at the beginning of the year, but now, Chanyeol is lucky to get a hug. More often than not, it's just a fist or a high five.

Chanyeol's finally starting to notice that he's loosing Baekhyun. It's a change that he can't pinpoint the exact start of, but it happened. And he's not sure how to reverse it because Baekhyun's just so incredibly happy. He's almost never seen without a smile now, while Chanyeol is always seen with either a blank face or a frown.

That day is no exception.

\---

At last, graduation night comes. Chanyeol is dressed in the cap and gown, listening as name after name is announced when it hits him like a slap to the face.

He doesn't know what college Baekhyun is going to.

How can he not know? Then again, he can't even remember the last time they exchanged more than two sentences. Baekhyun was always spending his time working or with Sehun's crowd.

His heart feels heavy as he watches Baekhyun walk up the stairs to accept his diploma with such a pure and genuine smile lighting up his features. He's so proud of how far they have come and the accomplishments they've acheived, but he can't help but feel sad at their lack of closeness. He can't help but feel like he should be celebrating the end of his childhood with the person he started it with.

He tries to blink away the tears pricking the corners of his eyes, because he knows he should be laughing, joking, and smiling. But he can't do it. For the first time ever, he's scared of the future. He's so scared of the future because now, he's not sure Baekhyun is in his. He's not sure if they'll talk anymore when the ease of being at the same school is taken away.

He's never felt this way before. Baekhyun used to be the only thing he was sure of.

His heart is breaking as he walks up to the stage, preparing to say goodbye to one chapter of his life. He plasters a smile on his face for the pictures but lets it fall immediately after.

He really hopes that Baekhyun isn't too far gone. He's not going to lose his best friend without a fight.

\---

Later that evening, he's incredibly drunk. He goes to a party thrown by Jongdae because he has nothing better to do. He drinks way more than he should because he wants to forget his pain, even if for one night. So he engages in stupid drinking contests and ends up stumbling around for the rest of the night.

He somehow thinks that it's a good idea to call Baekhyun to give him a piece of his mind. As he looks through his contacts, he nearly trips on the stairs to the front yard. He catches himself, just in the nick of time, on the railing.

Deciding against walking further, he sits on the steps and dials the number he hasn't called in months. There's no answer. It goes straight to voicemail, much to Chanyeol's chagrin.

He pauses for a moment after the beep, trying to formulate a somewhat articulate response. He quickly gives that up when he thinks of how hurt he is. "I fucking hate you," he spills out, slurring his words. "You ditched me. You never talk to me anymore! So much for being best friends, you jackass. I'm done. Don't ever call me again. I don't want you anymore!"

He's not sure where the last sentence came from, but it feels like the right thing to say. He wants to hurt Baekhyun the way he hurt him. And those words should do the trick.

He throws his phone on the ground before standing up on his wobbly legs to get back to the party.

\---

He wakes up in a room he isn't expecting to wake up in with the mother of all headaches. A groan slips out of his lips at the sun his eyes are greeted with. He brings a hand to his forehead, wishing that he could sooth the heavy pounding against his skull. He allows his eyes to fall closed as he rolls over on his side with the intention of falling back asleep. His hand comes into contact with someone's naked chest. He opens his eyes again, surprised to see Jongdae's sleeping face.

With a yelp of surprise, he startles upright in the sheets. Never did he think that he'd find himself in Jongdae's bed. How much did he drink last night?

And then reality sinks in. Everything from last night is blurry, but he can recall a few things. Particularly an angry voicemail message and Jongdae suggesting a physical way to take his mind off things.

He feels like shit for more reasons than his hangover. He can't believe he said those things to Baekhyun. Tears form in his eyes and he's completely at a loss. He doesn't know what to do. He doesn't know how to fix his relationship with Baekhyun because it's never been broken before. And he doesn't know what to do with his sleeping naked friend next to him, either.

But the last problem is solved when he wakes up and asks Chanyeol what's wrong. He doesn't know what he should or shouldn't say here, so he answers with, "I miss my best friend. I... called him and left a terrible voicemail."

Jongdae nods slightly, like he understands how Chanyeol really feels without saying anything. He pulls him into an awkward hug, no doubt to comfort him. "It's okay, Chanyeol. Baekhyun can handle it. Just call him and talk to him, okay? Let him know that you were just upset last night." Jongdae ruffles his hair and pulls away. "In the mean time, I'm going to get you some painkillers. Your head is probably throbbing from how much you drank. I'll be back."

He stands up, revealing his boxers. Chanyeol is kind of confused as to how last night really went because Jongdae is acting as if nothing happened. Or maybe it's just because they both are known for one night stands. This probably doesn't mean anything on his end, so it shouldn't be awkward for Chanyeol, either. He curls up in the sheets, lost in the pounding of his headache.

He's almost asleep when Jongdae comes back in with two plates of scrambled eggs and toast. "Hey... I figured you could use breakfast in bed. Besides, it's pretty bad taking painkillers on an empty stomach," he says as he hands a steaming plate over to him.

Chanyeol sits up and accepts the food graciously. "Thank you. This is very nice of you," he says, taking a few bites.

"You're welcome," Jongdae replies, eating at his own food happily. "So what do you remember about last night?"

Chanyeol's rather ashamed to admit he doesn't remember much. He can barely remember the phone call. Anything after that is pretty hazy. "What happened?" he asks, hoping against all hope that nothing bad happens between him and Jongdae now. He can't lose another friend.

"Well... keep in mind I was rather drunk, too. I suggested that we have sex to take your mind off of Baekhyun. It seemed like a good idea at the time. I hope this doesn't make things awkward between us. You're a good friend, Chanyeol... and it was just sex. I'm not looking for anything more than friendship with you."

Chanyeol heaves a sigh of relief. "Good. I was kind of worried, there."

Jongdae smiles an easy smile. "So was I. Anyway, you really should call Baekhyun back. He's probably really upset right now."

Chanyeol nods, but really, he wants to avoid it altogether. He doesn't want to apologize because he still wishes it didn't happen in the first place. That, and... well, he's starting to think maybe it's best that he lets Baekhyun go. Baekhyun will probably leave for college in a few months and so will Chanyeol. They won't have to see each other again. Besides, even if they patched things up, Baekhyun will be devasted that he has to leave his boyfriend. So they will spend all their time together until he has to go.

Chanyeol doesn't want that. If things end here, they'll end poorly, but it won't be drawn out or cause him much more pain.

Baekhyun's slipped through his hands like sand through an hourglass. It's too bad he didn't realize how he felt towards him sooner. Maybe they could have had a great relationship. Maybe it would have been him that he spent his grad night with. Maybe Chanyeol wouldn't have been such a playboy.

But he hadn't seen what was right in front of him all along until it was far too late to fix things.

He finishes his breakfast in silence, deep in thought over the situation he's faced with. He spends a few minutes with Jongdae and thanks him for the breakfast and painkillers before he collects his clothes to leave. He can't seem to find his phone, though, much to his annoyance. Jongdae doesn't have a clue what he did with it, either. So he promises to give it back to him if he finds it, and Chanyeol leaves.

He goes home, feeling a little naked without his phone. He sulks the entire walk there, unable to stop thinking about Baekhyun. The anger hasn't diminished, though. He's angry that Baekhyun isn't close to him anymore.

But he's also sad. He feels heartbroken that they've drifted apart. It's not fair. Not once did he doubt their friendship.

How did his relationship with Sehun tear that apart?

He broods as he comes to a conclusion. No, it wasn't his relationship with Sehun that drove them apart. It was just everything. Chanyeol has to admit he didn't really make as much an effort as he should have. That, and Baekhyun didn't make a huge effort, either.

Is their friendship worth fighting for or not? Chanyeol knows he has to make a decision.

He wishes he could wave a magic wand and make it all go back to the way it used to be.

\---

He's extremely surprised to return home with Baekhyun sitting on his bed with his back to the door. He just about had a heart attack because the last thing he expects in anyone to be in his room, much less Baekhyun.

"Uh... hi?" he asks uncertainly, wishing he'd stayed at Jongdae's. He's not ready for this. Not at all. Not when his skull is pounding and not when Baekhyun is being horribly quiet.

He doesn't respond. This is so unlike him that Chanyeol is a little freaked out. When Baekhyun is angry, he's viciously so. He'll yell, snap, and go total bitch mode. He's never quiet.

"Baek, about last night..."

Suddenly, the short brunette whips around to face him. If looks could kill, Chanyeol would be six feet under right now. He's never seen him look so livid before.

"What the fuck, Chanyeol?" he questions in a scary calm tone.

"Baek, I-"

"No. Don't speak. Listen to me. You're such an ass. Do you think I was happy to wake up to that kind of voicemail from you? No, I wasn't. You don't get to cowardly tell me your feelings when you're drunk off your ass. You don't get to tell me that I ditched you. Not when I waited three fucking years for you to get a clue!" That's when tears start falling down Baekhyun's cheeks, and Chanyeol stares at him dumbly.

"What... why are you crying?" he asks, hesitantly moving closer. He doesn't know if Baekhyun wants his comfort.

The shorter male furiously wipes away his tears. "You're such a fucking moron. I used to be in love with you, Chanyeol. But you didn't fucking notice. You said it was all just friendship and I told myself that it was the best I was ever going to get. So don't you turn it around on me, Chanyeol. You were the one who slept with anything that had legs. I was done waiting for you. You were absolute poison for me. So I'm sorry I 'ditched' you."

Chanyeol's eyes widen at the words he's hearing. Suddenly everything makes sense. He feels like his world is crashing down on him and slamming him with guilt.

Not even once did he consider Baekhyun's feelings on their relationship.

Not once did he ever think that Baekhyun was in love with him.

But it clicks. That's why their relationship fell apart after Sehun came into the picture. Because if everything they used to do together was seen as romance on Baekhyun's end, then when he shifted his romance to Sehun, of course things wouldn't be the same.

"I'm so sorry, Baek. Why didn't you ever tell me?" he asks, and immediately realizes it was the wrong thing to say, if Baekhyun's face had anything to say on the matter.

"Why the hell would you ask me that? You're a playboy! You always have been. I was left with being your friend or being a one night stand. I chose the first option."

Chanyeol feels impossibly angry at those words. How dare Baekhyun say that? "How dare you sell yourself so short?" he yells, fists clenched. "You are so much more than a one night stand. If you had told me, I never would have let you go."

Baekhyun stares back at him, completely stunned. He blinks a few times, slowly processing what Chanyeol said. "What?" he asks, mouth gaping a little.

"Baekhyun, I... I love you, too. I didn't realize it until recently. That's why I was so sad and hurt last night. I... I missed you. It felt wrong that I wasn't with you. I don't even know what college you're going to! Everything was just making me sad. I drank too much, and..." he trails off, so nervous and still feeling the same whirlwind of emotions as last night. "And I miss you."

The shorter male looks down to the ground with his lips pursed and his forehead creased. He looks as if he's struggling to find the words to say.

"Please, Baek. Say something," Chanyeol pleads, nervously grabbing his hand.

"I don't know what to say to you, Chanyeol. I gave up on loving you a year ago. I've moved on with Sehun. But... but you are right. It feels wrong to not be close to you." He meets Chanyeol's eyes. He can see the confusion in them, and his heart aches. He wishes he knew. He wishes Baek had said something.

"Please be my best friend again," he pleads, knowing that's all he'll get.

It dawns on him that this is the same pain Baekhyun faced for years and he feels sick. He just wants things to be okay. He wants to be happy with Baekhyun again.

"I... Chanyeol, I don't know if that's a good idea," the shorter replies, equally as nervous.

He tries to ignore the stabbing pain in his heart as he replies as calmly as he can. "Why?"

"Because I know that pain... and I don't know if we can just be friends. Were we ever just friends? And... and I'm moving for college soon. It'll be a clean break for you this way."

Chanyeol squeezes Baekhyun's hand and tries to blink away the tears forming in his eyes. "Please don't do this. I don't want to lose you, Baek. I already miss you so much."

Guiltily, Baekhyun retracts his hand. "I'm so sorry, Chanyeol. But I don't think we can be friends right now. I'm happy with Sehun. You... you need to get over this. We need a break." He pulls away to turn around and leave, and Chanyeol panics. He grabs Baekhyun's shoulder and forces him to turn around.

"No," he says desperately. "Isn't our friendship worth fighting for? We can at least try! We did used to be just friends. We grew up together. You can't just throw away years of friendship!"

Their faces are inches apart, and Baekhyun's dark chocolate eyes are filled with tears, too. "Chanyeol... don't pull that card. Our friendship means everything to me. But emotionally, we need to take a step back. And..." There's something different he sees in Baekhyun. It looks like fear, and Chanyeol can't comprehend what might make him scared. Baekhyun swallows thickly and says, "I'm going to England."

Chanyeol stops freezes as he processes this new information. This is a game changer, he knows it. And it terrifies him. "What?" he asks, reeling in shock.

"I got a scholarship to a really good fine arts college in England. I'm leaving in two months," he says quietly, avoiding Chanyeol's gaze and taking a step back. 

"But... what about your parents? What about Sehun?" he asks, desperate to find a reason for Baekhyun to stay.

"My parents are supportive. Sehun... is kind of going with me." Baekhyun refuses to meet his gaze, keeping it firmly trained on the ground. 

"What?" Chanyeol asks, lip trembling. More tears threaten to fall. 

"He wants me to follow my dreams but he didn't want to be left behind, either. So his parents arranged for him to study abroad. He's been wanting to for a few years now."

Chanyeol can't believe what he's hearing. He really can't accept the reality that Baekhyun is leaving the country with his boyfriend. He doesn't want to believe it, either, because it feels like there's no turning back if Baekhyun goes. Between the shock and the heartache, he struggles to find words. It'll be the end of it all. He doesn't want that to happen. "Please don't go," he says in a broken whisper. "Baek, I can't live without you." Tears start falling down his cheeks. 

"Chanyeol, don't cry. Please don't cry. I... I can't take it. We'll just take a break. When I get back from England... we'll try being friends again, okay?" Baekhyun sounds scared and nervous, but Chanyeol just can't find the words to fix this. He wipes his tears and grabs Baekhyun's wrist in a futile attempt to keep him from leaving. "Goodbye, Chanyeol." 

Baekhyun slips through his grasp and exits.

And he's gone.

Just like that, the sand runs out of the hourglass. 

**Author's Note:**

> There might be a companion story/sequel with Baekhyun's point of view, so stay tuned for that!
> 
> And thank you so, so, so much for reading. I cherish every single reader. And if you're going to leave a comment, I thank you in advance!


End file.
